Football Guy

July 28th is my anniversary. This year it will be four years...most of that time I have been lost in wonderment of how it's all going to work out!?

This past July 28th I sat in the Athletic Directors office interviewing for a basketball coaching job. As the AD and I toured the campus showing me the wonderful accomplishments and unfinished accomplishments, we approached the weight room, whereupon I met...football guy.

Football guy at a high school can be defined by simple observations...

-Football guy is never the head coach but the assistant defense coordinator

-Football guy manages to weave every conversation to 'the glory years' of when he played in college [most likely NCCAA division 3...the EXTRA C standing for Christian]

-upon introduction to football guy, football guy turns into handshake guy, in which he tries to crush your hand! The only redemption to him becoming handshake guy is the awkward moment of not knowing if I should of went for the pound or the double tap on the back bro hug!? The stress of knowing a proper handshake causes anxiety even to the most confident of men.

-Football guy is single and over forty.

-Football guy tells you how he runs 4 miles a day but looks like he countered the 4 mile run with 4 pizzas

-Football guy hates when you talk about the NFL being better than college football, and becomes extremely defensive when you call out his beloved SEC. So defensive that the only solution is to lift more weights.

-Football guy rocks the weight lifting gloves, back brace and Gatorade water bottle filled with a protein shake as he 'works out!'

Needless to say we all know football guy.

I love that on my anniversary I was graced with the presence and hilarity of football guy and handshake guy all in one magnificent person.

The eerie aspect about football guy?

If you change a few words and circumstances football guy begins to reflect basketball guy!

*This years record is 2-7 but we're fighting!

No comments:

Post a Comment